#2-Uncle Bud’s joke

Uncle Bud’s Joke (not so funny)

Uncle Bud tells the same joke every year at the first campfire, so every returning camper knows it by heart. And just before he gets to the end, we always interrupt by yelling out the punch line and laughing hysterically.

Here it is. But I warn you, it’s only funny if you’ve heard it a million times.

*     *     *     *     *

A man went into a restaurant with a gigantic, sharp-toothed monster on a leash.

“I’m terribly sorry, sir,” the waiter said, “Your creature looks extremely dangerous. You’ll have to tie him up outside.”

So the man took his monster outside and tied him to a post, then came back inside and ordered dinner. Just as he took the first bite, a little girl came into the restaurant and asked, “Does that terrible monster outside belong to anyone in here?”

illustration by Georgie Sinkoff

“It’s mine,” said the man. “Is there a problem?”

“Well, I’m really sorry,” the little girl said, “But my tiny little kitten just killed him.”

“Killed him!?” The man shouted. “How?”

“She choked him,” the little girl replied.

The man waved his arms in the air and asked loudly, “How could your tiny little kitten choke my great big monster?”

The little girl looked at the man and said, “She got stuck in his throat.”

*     *     *     *     *

Uncle Bud needs a new joke. If you know a better joke or a worse joke, please tell it to me.

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Comments from my Readers & Friends

  1. What does A vampire give you in the winter?

    A frost bite!

    (If you have a vampire costume let me know it will help you in the point battle. )

    • How did the otter know which side was the otter side? Maybe the otter was already on the otter side and the otter side was not on the otter side, but really on the side he was already on. Otterwise he would’ve made a trip for nothing. Some otters are not very wise, I guess.

  2. A man is listening to a conversation between a woman and her mother. He hears the woman say happy 50th birthday, when she really said happy 40th birthday. so he goes up to the woman and say “you look 40″
    I know. Hilarious

  3. Wait

    When Kevin was doing the cool duel y didn’t you just punch him in the face
    You would have gotten so many cool points from his screaming

  4. 2 guys walked into a bar.
    One asked for H2O. The other said, H20, too, please!
    The second guy died.
    Because the bartender thought he said H202, which is acid.

    Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his dad’s cherry tree, he also confessed. Now, Bob, do u see y he was not punished?

    Bob: Because George still had the ax in his hand….. XD

    • Actually, I looked H2O2 up…and it’s hydrogen peroxide, not acid. It wouldn’t taste very good, but I don’t think it would kill.