Vampires (The stuff on this webpage was mentioned on page 85 in my book.)

Illustration of a vampireI have never seen a real vampire, and no one I know knows anyone…
who knows anyone…
who knows anyone…
who knows anyone…
who knows anyone…
who knows anyone…
who has ever seen a real vampire.

And don't leave out the gory details.If you have seen a real vampire or, even better, been bitten by one, please tell me.

Zombies don’t count!

Please comment below.

Book 1

Mystery, mice, and money at the end of fifth grade!

from my book

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Comments from my Readers & Friends

  1. I know a vampire. She’s tried to bite me. But we’ve been best friends since preschool, and it doesn’t bug me anymore.

  2. A Zombie and a Vampire were both fighting each other to bite me. I was so scared! I was hoping that the Vampire would lose the fight, only because their teeth are so sharp and it would hurt alot more than the zombie’s bite. They finally got tired of fighting each other and then they both started walking slowly towards me. It was at this time that I woke up. Ever since then I decided to never sleep in class again.

    1. You guys (Logan, Hayley, Ella, etc.) are just trying to scare everyone. Vampires do not exist.

  3. i saw a vampire because my whole family is vampires mwahaahhahahhahahhahaahah mwahahahahahahahahah mwahahahahahahhahahaha

  4. I Vant To Suck Your Blood!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am a VAMPIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. one time my little bro came up to me and slaped me and then boom a vampier bit me

  6. I have been bitten by one. it hurts at first. also my little bro bit my foot before

    1. How come all these kids say they’ve been bitten by vampires when I have never seen one…and like I said in the book, no one I know has ever seen one either!
      I am a NON-BELIEVER in Vampires!

  7. I have been bitten before, when i was playing outside, it started to get dark, then POOF! Out of no where this guy comes up to me and randomly bites me!

  8. I’ve been bit by a vampire so i’ve also seen one. He just came in my room when I was sleeping. He bit me and then he casted a spell and disappeared. Now i’m being bit by a vampire sock no-

  9. i once think i saw a vampire: there was this guy runing down a side walk with a cape or something at night, and went to another neighborhood. i speed to the neighborhood the dude went, but alli saw was an object squeking across the sky.

  10. Once I saw a vampire sitting right next to me. It was like, “Dude! What up, your looking good today!”
    It was really just plain funny not scary. Now two years after that incounterment we’re still friends. He’s the best vampire ever! πŸ™‚

  11. Once it was a dark gloomy day and I was plopped on the couch reading Cheesie Mack is not a Genius or Anything when suddenly the doorbell rang. A man with jet black hair, pale skin and a long cape questioned “May I come in?” I gestured him to enter. Once in the kitchen he shrieked “Garlic!” I threw it out with a confused look on my face. He asked if he could wash his hands. I gave him directions to the nearest restroom. After a few minutes, I opened the door to ask him if he would like to eat anything when I got a huge surprise…I could not see him in the mirror! With surprise in my voice I asked “May you please leave?” He nodded, sadly. That was when I received the biggest shock of all. He sprang off the ground and instead of falling back down, a puff of smoke came into view. Suddenly, a large bat appeared! I felt like i was in a trance! He began screaming “Isabella?” Isabella?” The next thing I new, I was staring at my best friend. “You over slept! We will be late for school!” It was all a dream

    1. hey cheesie it is me Brandon and i just finshed your book today and it is good and plz tell me what your next book title is ok so i can read it

    1. Two reasons:
      1) Transylvania is in Europe, and that’s a long way…and very expensive.
      2) There’s no such thing as vampires!

    1. Two dots…very good way to describe what you saw. But I think they weren’t bite marks. Probably freckles!

  12. Ive seen a Vamp at the park… at least they looked like one. Pale, pointy teeth, holding an umbrella in pure daylight… And they had redish eyes. Not sure why they were at da park to begin with though

  13. I think my little sister is a vampire because her teeth are sharp and she bites me a lot. I wonder how my blood taste!

    1. really you have been bitten by one i doubt thats highly possible unless you beleive in them!!!! πŸ™‚

  14. I think my sister’s a vampire, because her teeth grew in weird, and are really sharp.

    1. Emily, jbee, & Patrickβ€”

      Sharp teeth does not = vampire. Claiming it’s true does not = vampire.
      Vampires are not good.
      There is no such thing as a vampire!

      Dr. Frank N. Cheez has spoken!

  15. It is really hot here and it like never rains so I think its IMPOSSIBLE for vamps to live here. I don’t believe in that stuff. Though, I do like the taste of blood. Its salty! πŸ˜€ I have a feeling vamps like salt… :/

    1. Wow I never knew that! You always are learning something new everyday! But I still don’t believe in that stuff.

  16. Sup Cheese-o-rama my friend,boy,is a vampire.He tried to bite me once but, i grabbed some garlic and pow he was out

  17. When I was a kid, my parents thought I had a rare skin condition. The next morning, they saw two bite holes. I can never go in the sun again. Every time my family accedentily cut themselves, my eyes turn bright green.

    1. Hi k k it’s mari nunu I just wanted to say thx for writing to me
      Bye bye
      See you at school
      Don’t tell anyone at school I’m a vampier ok

    1. you are soooo right. i looked in the big book of questions and answers and it said vamp are NOT REAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    2. People are so crazy about all that super natural stuff. It is all just to make movies scarier, lifes creeper, and people scared. I DO NOT APPROVE OF THAT STUFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    1. Really you don’t believe me
      Why would u feel sorry for me
      I havent dronkin blood yet
      I’m steel a nice person

    2. But if you turn into a vampire (which I don’t believe you will), you’ll become dangerous and evil. At least that’s what the legends say.

    3. Well I’m not evil you’re the one that’s evil
      If you don’t believe me that’s totally you’re fault
      Any way how would you know anything about vampires YOU’RE not one so how do you know what they go threw when they transform. They don’t. They don’t transform at All the stay in one form and they don’t have LONG sharp pointy teeth.
      There CANINE teeth are just longer than others

  18. OMG OMG you visited me TODAY! it even says on the right side of the page!!!! Your awesome! I loved the story about the you scaring the kids at the camp! I was the one with the short hair and glasses! I hope you saw me! I didn’t buy your book but I will definetly read it all of them 1st, 2nd, and the one you wrote a little in my librarian (Mrs.Vreeland) computer!

    1. remember me you came to my school today!
      I am the one you called mad on the board. the one with the real alex welch

    1. Fake vampires do NOT count! I REALLY want to know if anyone has REALLY seen a REAL vampire.
      I bet not!

  19. i have a bff that is vampire ( so she says) and she sposebly bit me ugh and she is mad at me right now cause she said ” i am a lier” well she lied about the vampire

  20. I havent seen vampires in movies or in life. ( I know vampires are in movies but ive never watched a movie with a vampire in it.)

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